Oh Cramp! – A random rant about period pains.

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After barely crawling through the past weekend and the past few days, I have finally gathered the strength to declare war on what has proved to be one of my worst undefeated enemies over the years! Period pains!!! And yes, you guessed right, I choose to use words as they are my most trusted weapons in many wars lol.

You know I always wonder why period pains have to be soooo brutal to me. I mean, for the most, I am good citizen. I pay my taxes, I do not litter and I am a registered voter. Surely that should give me some form of immunity from the torture that comes with this bleeding pain. But no, it’s a constant fight for my life whenever Mr P comes along.

Also, I am well aware that society has tried to make conversations such as this one almost taboo. I find that weird lol. We should be free to talk about periods and the pain associated without it feeling like an abomination. The stares in the store, especially from the non-bleeding privileged gender, when I am confidently carrying my pads really baffles me. What’s even worse is how shopkeepers try their best to pack them away real quick or layer them in opaque material- it’s as if they’d rather die before their female customers are brought into community damnation for purchasing pads LOL this has to stop, please.

Anyway, I think it would be retrogressive to not turn this random rant into something more growing like, maybe… Tips on how to deal with period pains. So here goes some positivity:

My 5 tips on how to deal with period pains:

  1. Just CRY

Lol. No but really, I sometimes cry to let the pain flow.

2. Hot Water Bottle

My hot water bottle (or equivalent alternatives) are really my best friends during the very trying times. I don’t know the science behind it, I never really like biology and other sciences in high school to be honest. But there should be a medical explanation for how the heat helps with soothing the pain.

3. Hot Shower

Again. Heat comes in to save the day. This really helps me. Also, the water should almost burn me for it to do justice.

4. Caaaaaaaake & Sweet Treats

*deep happy sigh* there’s something about my sweet guilty pleasures and winning the war against the painful period villains. Albeit temporarily, it really does the deeds.

5. Sleeping on the floor

See everything about this villain is about discomfort. It’s really the enemy that is out to kill. So in surrender I humbly lay on the cold hard floor and – somehow, sometimes, it does help.

Additional tip: PAINKILLERS!!! This should have topped my list if I am being honest, I would have probably been a loving memory without them. lol


To conclude this random rant, I should state that as a diplomatic person who believes in negotiations over violence and conflict, I truly believe we are underserving of the brutality that comes with period pains. Worse still, we are not afforded a platform or opportunity to negotiate the terms and conditions. Like if you asked me- a monthly text message, saying “SAFE” or something would be a better alternative. But what are the odds *cries* …. but we are not quitters! We live to fight another day lol

So, tell me dear readers, what are your effective remedies against the period pain plague? Do some of my tips above resonate with you?

For my non-bleeding readers, please share what you do to help in this never ending fight lol if you dont do anything, I am side eyeing and judging you!! Just kidding…. or am I? lol

Okay, I am done for now.

Until next time,

Read on and live long,